Training continues at lunch time...
As you have probably read...training was already a bit trying. Well...after the one officer broke the entire computer system, the instructor sent us to lunch to try to buy some time to fix the computers!
Now I used to live in the exact neighborhood that the training facility was in. I was very familiar with the area and I suggested a bunch of different restaurants and we decided that we would all go to a local mexican restaurant where they provide a lunch buffet that's quite a deal.
I must prepare the setting...or the cast, as it may be.
There is me, my current work partner, and my former training officer. We're all the normal ones. Then there's the old man who lives a fantasy life that breaks computers, the snarftard and the weebol. Well, the hostess had to prepare a table, since we were a larger party. And by larger, I mean the weebol. The hostess sat us at a couple of tables that were surrounded by a bench on one side and by 3 chairs on the opposite. As I scooted into the bench part, my partner and my former training officer scooted next to me. Snarfy, Weebol and Mr Fantasy sat opposite. I looked at my partner and we both laughed as we had to pull the table about a foot and a half in, in order to reach our plates.
Well...the entertainment begins after the menus were given to us. Mr Fantasy wondered aloud what type of domestic beer they provided and I responded by telling him that it was a full bar, they had whatever he wanted. This was followed by Snarftard repeating the same statement approximately 11 times, as if it was his own statement to begin with. (rainman anyone?)
As my irritation with Snarfy mounted...Mr Fantasy decided to fuck with him. Great. Now you've got tard on tard abuse. Snarfy complained that he wanted cheese enchiladas, and that was the only item that had run out in the buffet. Well, as Weebol repeatedly filled and consumed her plate...Mr Fantasy keeps telling Snarfy that there were fresh enchiladas and Snarfy kept jumping up to retrieve them, only to find that there were still no new enchiladas.
Needless to say...this is an ugly training session and the lunch wasn't helping. We all had ordered some sort of alcoholic beverage to enable us to deal with the training and we were all finished with our meals and our drinks. Mr Fantasy still had almost a full schooner of beer and we said we couldn't leave because he wasn't finished with his beer yet. Unbeknownst to us...he sucked that thing down faster than anything we've ever seen.
Okay, time to leave...much to my surprise, Mr Fantasy wants to drive back to training with ME instead of everybody else. Great. For the trip back I got to hear all about his mysterious "twins" that bought him a new 42 inch plasma TV and his magical godson/son/boyband member who mounted the television onto the wall. Do you understand how difficult it is to keep quiet to a psychotic nutjob after you've had a drink? Another day in paradise...
Now I used to live in the exact neighborhood that the training facility was in. I was very familiar with the area and I suggested a bunch of different restaurants and we decided that we would all go to a local mexican restaurant where they provide a lunch buffet that's quite a deal.
I must prepare the setting...or the cast, as it may be.
There is me, my current work partner, and my former training officer. We're all the normal ones. Then there's the old man who lives a fantasy life that breaks computers, the snarftard and the weebol. Well, the hostess had to prepare a table, since we were a larger party. And by larger, I mean the weebol. The hostess sat us at a couple of tables that were surrounded by a bench on one side and by 3 chairs on the opposite. As I scooted into the bench part, my partner and my former training officer scooted next to me. Snarfy, Weebol and Mr Fantasy sat opposite. I looked at my partner and we both laughed as we had to pull the table about a foot and a half in, in order to reach our plates.
Well...the entertainment begins after the menus were given to us. Mr Fantasy wondered aloud what type of domestic beer they provided and I responded by telling him that it was a full bar, they had whatever he wanted. This was followed by Snarftard repeating the same statement approximately 11 times, as if it was his own statement to begin with. (rainman anyone?)
As my irritation with Snarfy mounted...Mr Fantasy decided to fuck with him. Great. Now you've got tard on tard abuse. Snarfy complained that he wanted cheese enchiladas, and that was the only item that had run out in the buffet. Well, as Weebol repeatedly filled and consumed her plate...Mr Fantasy keeps telling Snarfy that there were fresh enchiladas and Snarfy kept jumping up to retrieve them, only to find that there were still no new enchiladas.
Needless to say...this is an ugly training session and the lunch wasn't helping. We all had ordered some sort of alcoholic beverage to enable us to deal with the training and we were all finished with our meals and our drinks. Mr Fantasy still had almost a full schooner of beer and we said we couldn't leave because he wasn't finished with his beer yet. Unbeknownst to us...he sucked that thing down faster than anything we've ever seen.
Okay, time to leave...much to my surprise, Mr Fantasy wants to drive back to training with ME instead of everybody else. Great. For the trip back I got to hear all about his mysterious "twins" that bought him a new 42 inch plasma TV and his magical godson/son/boyband member who mounted the television onto the wall. Do you understand how difficult it is to keep quiet to a psychotic nutjob after you've had a drink? Another day in paradise...
posted by inside the police at 1:48 PM
2 Comments:
Wow...and this guy is armed...LEGALLY???
Are you done blogging, Copper?
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